Persective

I have come across interesting outcomes when telling someone you have quit drinking.

If you tell them, "you know, I was just drinking too much, it was harder and harder to put the bottle down, my life was spiraling out of control," the reaction you will get is more akin to telling someone you have inoperable cancer.  They either get solemn expressions, studying your face with a grim tide, and looking for answers to what happened to you, or they look down and away, desperately trying to find a reason to leave.  Usually, the latter group of people are not going to be part of your life in the future, as you have become persona non grata, an outcast who they never want near, for the potential of you putting a harsh on their drinking vibe.

If you tell them, "hey, I decided to just get healthy and stop drinking, it was empty calories and I wasn't getting enjoyment from it anymore, so I quit," the response is completely different.  Women will say, "wow that's great," usually giving you a flirtatious smile with the encouragement.  Men will say, "that's cool.  How did you pull it off?" like I am talking about the latest diet/exercise fad.  But in a funny observation of human reaction, some will also lower their head and turn away, uncomfortably, just like the friends in the first scenario, the ones who will avoid you, afraid of getting their like of drink on you.  It's as if they have discovered I'm an alien in Invasion of the Body Snatchers.  "You can't be a normal human and not drink!"

I'm not trying to drive friends away or have deep heartfelt conversations every time I tell someone I have quit drinking, so I usually go with the second explanation.

What people want to feel like when they give up drinking is human.  They don't want to feel like they have a serious illness, or are a pariah within the culture.  They want support, but not the kind which is trying to walk on egg-shells around them.

If it's hard for you to be around people who are not drinking, what does that really say about you?