Death in the Family

I am sad.  My wife's father, a man who'd been a father to me, died on Friday and I've been emotionally wrecked all week.

He went out about as good as one could, under the circumstances.  His cancer had ravaged him, but even back in May he was still fairly active.  He went the homeopathic route when diagnosed seven years ago, dramatically changing his diet and intake.  You can't deny it did wonders.  The problem was, in the final year, he kept looking for a homeopathic life extender.  Thinking he was going to go to the desert and find a cactus plant or dirt mound which would cure him was nothing more than wishful thinking, but even I can't argue the thought there might be something to keep him going longer, kept him strong until the end.  Back in June, I think he finally accepted reality.

He will be cremated, and buried on Saturday.  This is my first time directly dealing with death, where I've had to help with the after planning.

Make sure you talk to your loved ones about it all.  I know it's uncomfortable, but please do.  Talk about the will, the power of attorney, the living will, a trust, and anything else which might be applicable.  Talk about who you want to get what after you pass and make sure you understand the laws in your state on what happens to inheritance.  Arizona, where my grandmother died, is a scheme, designed to get every bit of money out of the deceased and their family.  No matter what you got, they will get it from you in AZ.

Make sure you say your goodbyes.  Vern died with his daughters around him.  They had been around him for the last few months and each one had had the opportunity to talk to him, tell him they loved him and said what needed to be said.

Life is short...undeniably brief.  We, if lucky, inherit this planet for little more than 3/4ths of a century.  Cherish it, and never let something go unsaid or unaddressed.