Zero Drink Minimum

Yesterday, my significant other returned after a 10 day trip to Mexico.  I was concerned about being alone.  I had to manage my kids, each of whom has their own agenda and activities, and manage the house, dog and my job too, but since I'm also an alcoholic who gave up the booze a year plus ago, I was concerned how the stress would manifest itself.

My appreciation for single parents who run the schedule I did, not for ten days, but for for 18 years, is in the stratosphere.  I realize I had some extremely narrow minded, short sighted thoughts in regards to single parents.  I have learned, and I apologize.  Even though I never tried to give parenting advice to a single parent in a condescending manner, and even though I kept my most harsh misguided criticism internal, I feel the need to expose my sinful thoughts and acquiesce.

I never got to a point where me drinking was a concern.  Last Tuesday, St. Patrick's Day, I made my corned beef, which requires boiling the sucker for 11 hours in a beer/brine mixture.  I poured the beer into the slow cooker, rinsed out the bottles and felt proud I never once, even with the somewhat delightful smell of hops, tried to take a taste of the remnants.

Friday was the tough day.  I was exhausted, mentally fried and just trying to get to the weekend.  My internal monologue piped up, "wouldn't a drink on a Friday night help take the edge off?"  I quickly started to bash the thought crossing my mind.  That's all I needed to do, manage everything I had to, but for an extra challenge, do it drunk!  I was happy with the intensity I crushed upon the notion.  It never came up again.

I am healthier, and happier.  It feels good to know that even under extreme stress I didn't falter, or even entertain the idea of faltering.  The real trick is to never ease up on beating down the outrageous justifications for unacceptable behavior my own mind can come up with.