Make Believe

Let's play make believe!
In our suburban bereave, under the eaves
Engage in fantasy, as reality unweaves

I'll pretend to be a blue collar worker
A shirker, hurker, jerker, smirker!
I'll pay big money to get clothes
Which will transpose and disclose
Allow me to pose with out offending the nose
Then I'll get a truck
Not one that sucks
One that makes me a big buck
I run amok, I'll never get stuck
While we all head to the Mall
Never heeding the wild's call.
About my motorcycle I'll get frantic,
Obsess over organic,
Pretend to be a romantic
As sycophantics appease
And my pedantic antics
Prevent me from becoming manic

You too can can play and portray,
Pay someone to make your display
For the PTA, a nay bouquet
While you hit the gym, to stay slim
Maybe flirt with him? Work you limbs,
And swim, becoming trim
To compete while your child bleats
She gets beat, triumphant defeat for her meat
You can bring in your team
The house theme? Gleam!
Seam to seam
Your fake balance beam,
Per diem with your screen regime
Screaming the American dream
Thank God for drugs,
A bear hug, keeping your mug snug
Just plug a chug from the jug

Then there's the food
Never home stewed or cued
Exuded, extruded, and delude for you
So you can chew and chew and chew and chew
There or at home, where you gloam
Your Rome when you're not roaming.
An existence that's fake
Where you're forsake, by the lake
And ache for a remake,
A new take away from the snake
We'll play parents
Lavish them with presents,
To circumvent the malcontents and discontents
Taking credit for them being ladies and gents
If they're full of resent, we'll misrepresent
The turn of events.

And then we'll die
A cry, a sigh, exposing the lie
We tried to deny.
Goodbye...

Friday Music - The Mountain Goats

Fewer days, Less time...

Bad Luck

Something I've noticed in regards to not drinking anymore, I don't have the bad luck I used to have.  I'm not talking about the consequences of drinking, like a DWI, a bad hangover or falling out of a chair.  I'm talking about actual bad luck, where bad things happen more often, at least more often than they have since I've stopped.

I believe in fate, karma, kismet.  I've had too many things happen, realities exposed, and crossed paths with too many people, to not feel as if some level of divine intervention exists.  I'm a practicing Catholic.  I know, criticize away, but I do not chalk this stuff up to the dalliances of God.  There just seems to be a negative aura which surrounded me when I was drinking.

Important papers got misplaced, the car breaking down, something that was working fine suddenly stopping, some mishap at work.  These things would be easy to dismiss if I could point to the sauce, but they had nothing to do with my drinking, at least not directly.  It's not like bad things don't happen to me today, but there's far less negativity involved in my life since I sobered up.

I noticed this phenomenon a few weeks back when the garage door busted.  I remember it doing so a few years back and it was a nightmare getting it fixed.  The guy was sick, couldn't find my house, didn't have the right part; all of this lead to a major inconvenience.  This time?  "We can be out there in one hour!"  I remember one time a bill got mailed, on time, correctly stamped and addressed, and it didn't show up in the account as paid for a month, causing me a lot of stress and anxiety.  That never happens.  Last month I mailed bills three days before they were due, and they all got there on time, regardless of where they were headed.

And you couldn't miss the bad luck in regards to the health of my kids.  Before I was hitting the bottle hard, my three rarely got sick.  Once, my middle child was falling down the stairs, I reached up and made the grab of a lifetime, her ankle, saving her from serious injury.  When I was drinking, the kids were getting sick a lot, and they would get injured in the weirdest ways.  We even had a skull fracture.  Since I gave up drinking, I can't remember the last time the kids got sick, or injured.

There are a lot more, but I'm sounding crazy.  Just an observation...

The Pretty Tree

You're Safe Little Boy

Every night she knows you're scared, torn between the two worlds you inhabit
Lie down and fall asleep, little boy, your mother is watching over you
Intently tending to you while you sleep, keeping you safe, perdurable bonds hearten
Over the hours, maintaining her vigil of the purest love, the fiercest affinity
To you little boy, be brave.  she fights to keep you safe with uncomfortable devotion even she can't resist.

Friday Music - Calvin Harris feat. Ellie Goulding

Just because it's popular doesn't mean it's not good...


Dark...

Keeping Busy

I just finishing proof reading a friends first novel.  It's quite good, a sweet story of love in 1989.  I have to tell her some of her cultural references are way off.  I'm not looking forward to that.

I've kept busy; I'd forgotten the time of year.  April, when life starts coming back.  Some years, the earth returns with more vigor than others.

Friday Music - MisterWives

I am tired. It's been a busy week. The ball is in your court...